Being Diplomatic

     In my neighbourhood there is a couple. There are always loud quarrels between them. One day out of frustration I decided to ask the husband. "Whats wrong with you and your wife?" Poor husband quickly began telling me as if I was his best friend. He told that they were a newly wed couple and that his wife is a bad cook. Early on in their marriage when she started to cook even though the food was bland or outright bad, he would eat it with delight and praise her. As days passed she became annoyed as his lunch box would never be empty and one day in a pique of anger he insulted her. I wasn't able to give him any advice but I thought rather than taking a jibe at her he could have handled the matter days ago but with 'diplomacy'. He could have suggested her to add some spice or salt or even refer some cookery shows and books.
   Diplomacy is an art these days. Its the ability to assert your ideas or opinions, knowing what to say or how to say without damaging the relationship by causing offence. An old English proverb says "Honesty is the best policy" but today being completely honest might lose you, your friends, your family and even your job.
    When your girl friend questions you, "Am I looking fat?" if your straight answer is 'no' then great but if you want to say 'yes' and you say it, it might result in conflicts. When a painter shows you a picture of his and the only thing you want to say is ''Its really bad'' but you could say ''May be you could have chosen a different topic." When a singer sings for you and you dislike it you can say "You might consider using a higher/lower pitch, that would sound wonderful!" When your boss asks you,"How is the presentation? Should there be any changes made?" You could pitch in with honest and constructive criticisms and not mere hate. Sometimes these diplomatic ways of tacking situations works wonders and sometimes being honest might only be the solution. In being diplomatic, its not important what you say but how you say it. Your empathy, kindness must be seen.
   Every country has their diplomats they know how to handle dicey situations and if they cannot we know what results are caused. David Mamet said," The great war stories are tragedies. Its a failure of diplomacy." There would never be wars, conflicts if the situations are handled with diplomacy. Thinking before you act and using decisive language are methods to be diplomatic. Yes, Its tough and hard.
   There is a very thin line between being diplomatic and being honest but its every persons perspective and his ability to read the situation and its need.